[mou] angry exchanges

[Thomas Maiello]

I always feel uneasy and discomforted when these venues are used for  
arguments and personal reactions rather than just sharing our love for  
birds.  I don't like the angry exchanged because it is something that  
I have been guilty of too.

I have bad days and manage to put both feet in my mouth when I am in  
reaction to something someone says to me or I judge or misjudge what  
someone does.  I find that this often filters down to me just wanting  
to be right about something - and I find I do this more than I like to  
admit.

It takes two or more to fight or to argue.  I have received what I  
call "nasty-grams" and I have authored them too.  For me it is always  
in the spur of the moment and before I realize it, I have immortalized  
my spur of the moment anger or reaction to the world in the form of an  
email - written words for eternity.  I eternally wish that I could  
take them back for that spur of the moment wasn't who I really was -  
it was just a reaction.

Now when I receive a nasty-gram I just figure that person is just  
having a bad day and somehow they think it is about me.  They don't  
even know me.  They are just in reaction to something they interpreted  
me saying that pushed their buttons.  And when I send out a nasty- 
gram, the recipient can interpret it as an attack or just hear it as  
me having a bad day and thinking it is about them.  I don't even know  
most of them.

Everyone on this listserve loves birds and spend countless hours  
relating to them and sharing about them and making a difference in  
their passion.  It is what we have in common.  Isn't there enough  
violence and war and suffering in this world to allow a bunch of bird  
lovers to let some things go and get back out there watching the joy  
of birds?

Look, there's a Red-Breasted Nuthatch at my feeder right now (probably  
not a RBN or a RBNH or a RN as I sometimes abbreviate and get  
corrected and learn something new about scientific bird  
abbreviations).  Ain't it pretty?




Thomas Maiello
Angel Environmental Management, Inc.
Maple Grove, MN