[mou] Rethinking

[Thomas Maiello]

I have been astounded at my reaction and realizations around this 
apparent albino house sparrow that is floating about my yard.  In the 
midst of a cloud of brown with tinges of black and white that is a flock 
of house sparrows swarming the ground around my feeders - there in the 
midst comes this angelic image that forces me to actually look at these 
birds.  I cannot tell if this unique bird is behaving like a house 
sparrow or is the same size or shape - it is like an optical illusion 
demanding me to notice a bird simply as a bird.  With all my negative 
history with house sparrows - the poop in the nest in the soffits of my 
home in Oklahoma, the swarming and emptying of feeders, their expansion 
into cavities and removing their use for migrants, the terrorizing of 
cavity nesting migrants, the out and out murder of competing species - 
none of this comes to mind when this white feathered image floats across 
my yard and nestles in the grass to find seed.  Even all the sparrows 
around it seem different. 

I am realizing almost a mindless mild disgust I have formed for 
practically all house sparrows instead of just the ones whom I have 
witnessed behaving in ways I view as detrimental to those species I like 
more.  And they are just doing what house sparrows do - nothing more and 
nothing less.  I notice how deeply seeded and simply acceptable this 
historical dislike is, almost something for which I hold myself higher 
with as I bash the species.  I wonder where else I do this and to whom 
without thinking or even realizing.  This bird is a blessing for me to 
notice my thinking and to look at personal, local, state, and world 
events and see how my thinking might play out in them.  Yes I am 
imparting human characteristics and behaviors on these birds but a light 
is turning on for me to be awake - awake to my thinking and how my mind 
runs on autopilot based on my historical experiences - not simply 
appreciating the birds I see in this moment and appreciating the miracle 
every bird is.  This unusual white bird demands my attention and I sit 
in awe at its presence in the midst of my world - knowing I am learning 
something I might have missed had it not flown in.  And I am grateful.  
Perhaps such a lesson is available in every bird I see - more than just 
the beautiful feathers and uniqueness that birds are.

The entire world plays out in every niche.  And now it seems so in my 
passion of birdwatching.  Thank you little white bird.

I hope this wasn't inappropriate for this web-net but I just had to 
share this aspect of my birdwatching.

Thomas Maiello
Spring Lake Park